3 Reasons to Talk Like You Should Write …
5 Ways to Do It

Love or hate his politics, you have to admire the President’s knack for talking like he writes and getting his wordsmiths to write like he talks. He sounds the same in his books, at the lectern with a prepared speech, and in a Town Hall without notes.

That’s because President Obama understands instinctively that the mouth and typing fingers are merely different conduits from the same thought process, whose aim is to engage others in dialogue of some sort.

Writing like you talk, which I talked about in my last piece of writing, is challenging but doable. Injecting the dynamics of exchange from conversations into your copy can be intimidating for some. The changeover requires shifting your focus from the form and pride of writing to its purpose, which is, simply, to talk with folks. But you can pull that off.

Talking like you write … well, that seems considerably more awkward and somewhat unnecessary — but not less desirable, right? Wouldn’t upgrading your conversational style from dribble and drabness to approximate crisp writing raise your self-esteem and perceived value? I think yes. I also think there are other reasons.

I’ll point out 3 .

1. Perception is often reality, like it or not.

The impression we make on others such as higher-ups at work comes mostly from the innumerable impromptu dialogues we have with them, not from prepared presentations at meeting. Yet we invest enormous amounts of time and money developing presentation skills yet not talking skills.

As a result, notice what happens if you interrupt some polished presenter with a difficult question. Suddenly, he starts stuttering and dancing. When he returns to his presentation, he is less credible and less fluid. Better if he had prepared himself to talk not lecture and to speak from his soul not his PowerPoints.

2. PCD — Post-Conversation Distress — is painful, even ruinous.

PCD strikes when, for instance, you say impulsively and flippantly to impress your boss that the architect you met last night was a horrific bore, only to find out that he’s your boss’ brother-in-law. (That happened to me.)

When our mouths are tethered to our emotions rather than hotwired to our brains, we generate regrets – regrets about what we should have said, what we should not have said, and what we are determined to say next time – assuming there is a next time.

3. For those with leadership leanings, talking smart is a smart trait.

Up-and-comers are regularly thrown into situations where what you say in conversations will represent and reflect the organization and/or executives.

For example, you are sitting across from a major client when the boss calls your cell phone to say he will be seriously late to the meeting and wants you to cover for him, though you don’t have his agenda or presentation.

Small talk won’t work here. You can’t look like you’re sweating, trying to kill time, or merely acting as a stand-in. What you say has to be business-like, productive, and, oh yeah, engaging.

How, then, can you become not only a good conversationalist but an integrated communicator – that is, someone who communicates consistently and naturally whether chatting with a colleague, presenting to the Board, or writing a report on budget cuts?

Here are 5 suggestions from writing that should help you master the art of conversation.

1. Strong leads
   If you want to yank in your reader and link with your dialogue partner, start with something bold, interesting, and other-directed. Not this: “Hey, Ed. Awful weather we’re having, huh? They say more rain is possible tonight.” Yawn.

   Such a trite opener suggests you don’t have anything worthwhile to say and are hoping the other party takes over the conversation. It would be akin in writing to plagiarizing, “It was the best of time, it was the worst of times.”

   Instead, begin with something that draws in the other party’s interest. For example, “Hi, Ed. Whew! The last time I saw rain like this was during that dreadful trade show we attended in Wichita, remember?”

2. Short paragraphs

Attention spans have always been short for listeners, and now readers, too, have become easily distracted scanners. If you want to convey something important, you must train yourself to talk in pithy phrases and write with short paragraphs. Your objective is to generate the right phrasings and a bit of drama to win and keep the listener and reader’s attention and trust.

3. Lots of bullets

English majors and too many academic writers balk at using bulletins because bullets, they think, clip and cheapen important points that require deep and long explanations. That may be true, but, again, most readers and listens are not into deep and long, sad though that may be.

Therefore, organize your conversations and your writings to be visual and aural. Inject three points or two ideas, and use your voice and fingers to emphasize that these bullets points are important stuff that won’t take much of her time.

4. Season with stories

Good writing is built on good stories. So are good conversations. The more you can relate information to experience, the more effective will be your message. Think about and talk stories, analogies, metaphors, and similes – oh yeah, and jokes.

5. Think others

Your role as writer and conversationalist is to insert yourself enough into the dialogue to coax a response from the reader/listener but not so much that you’re forcing or over-extending your presence. No one enjoys listening to someone talk incessantly about himself any more than wading through the confessions of a self-absorbed writer.

Take long breaths between comments (and paragraphs) to make sure you being listened to and are listening. You must always stay on the same channel as the other party or reader.

Richard Skaare 07.16.09

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